Peaceful parenting, it's not always so peaceful...

I like to think that I'm a peaceful parent. Most of the time I am pretty easy going, patient, have a long fuse & like to connect with my children & sort out our differences in a fairly gentle manner.

But OH MY GOD sometimes kids really push your buttons.

Picture the scene...

Standing in the kitchen, sweat pouring down your face. You have a 15 month old on your hip while you make a family sized macaroni & cheese (where the sauce takes about a year to thicken), cook sausages in the oven & cook a lentil casserole at the same time. Pretty intense, huh? Add to that said 15 month old has a cold, sorry, man flu & is covered in snot & trying to fight his way down your t-shirt. Deep breathing, stay calm, count to ten.

The heat gets too much, you have to escape the heat into the living room for a breather & proceed to sit down on the couch with the baby & nurse him. No sooner than baby is latched on, all hell breaks loose. 8 year old brother starts fighting with 3 year old son. It's chaos, nobody is listening. You finally break up that fight & 10 year old sister decides she'll be the protector of all children & put on her Supergirl pants & attempts to beat seven shades of shit out of her 8 year old brother. There's a few seconds of calm... The 8 year old springs into action, rising from the ashes like the proverbial phoenix & kicks 10 year old sister thus causing another fight. Meanwhile, attempting to nurse 15 month old, save 3 sets of food from setting the house on fire & becoming virtually unedible, it gets too much. The noise, the chaos, the devastation. *SNAP* That moment where you just can't take any more & end up hollering at the top of your lungs. A-HA! There! Have that, that'll stop you in your tracks. Oh wait, the house is still a sea of entropy. Another holler & another until finally, a wave of calm.

Sitting on the couch, awash with sweat, 15 month old long gone, snot covered & joyful. Clothing disheveled from a failed attempt to breastfeed. Ashamed.

Yes, tonight I took the peace out of peaceful parenting. And any parent out there who can honestly turn around & tell me that they have never had an experience where your children have drove you to the brink of a nervous breakdown, you're either a liar, or I'm delusional in thinking I'm normal.

To all those gentle parents out there who have ever had a "moment", please don't be ashamed or kick yourself. Forgive yourself & embrace these moments, because one day you can look back & laugh at how naive you were those 9 months you thought you'd be a "perfect parent".

- M

Oh & for the record, I ended up eating the lentil casserole cold, the macaroni & cheese was disgusting apparently & W wasn't feeling well so didn't eat the sausages. Oh well, tomorrow is another day.